NormIs Size Important?
[Size] [Size] [Size]
[Colour?]
[Pulsating Purple?]
[Throbbing Red?]
[Sperm White?]
[Labial Fuchsia?]
[Bold?]
Bet the length of your penis or the depth of your vagina on it. All on Black? All on No. 69? On the roulette wheel of life? But more importantly? Bet the sum total of your intellectual property on it. But don't always thing big. Bet big but sometimes think small. All this talk about size? Mind Monopoly. Play fair. Don't put too many hotels on Playfair. Try Park Lane sometimes. Life is a roll of the dice. Double sixes fit. Six and One don't. Two threes fit. But a four and three makes 7? If you can add up. Not everyone is a six and not everyone is a one. Albeit unique and one. Men's penises vary in size. Women's vaginas vary in depth. It's all about a perfect fit. A perfect roll of the dice. But you have to play a bit of Mind Monopoly to understand this principle. Or Squatter. For when women squat? Expect a golden shower and cleanse yourself. Take a ruler (Not a Howard or George Dubba-Ya type:a school ruler). Take instruction and be wise. Shove a ruler (or preferably a depth guage) into 1000 women. Do a decent survey. No Morgan Giddy-Up or Gallop Pole. And don't pervert or alter the stats to make them say what you want them to say. Be real. Or get a job as a Govt Statistician if you're like that. Once you've plunged the ruler in? Pull it out. Check the 'water' stains. See how far a woman's come comes up? Look for a G-shaped stain. Use a magnifying glass if you have to. It will be there somewhere. Observe closely how the increments differ. Then measure the length and breadth and depth of your penis. With the same ruler. Don't touch it against your foreskin though. Far too erotic. And once you've got the measurements right? See? Size? It's all rubbish. (unless we're discussing comparative sizes of vagina-depths and penis-lengths, not just the size of the penis. All this talk about size? It's all designed to make the modern man feel inadequate and accept those penis-enlargement SPAM offers. When the reality is? Real women don't just measure the size of your erect penis; they measure the size of your brain. Call in the neuro-surgeon. Right now! Do a scan. Boost your self confidence. Love-making is about full-on mind and body engagement. Real women? THey can come without your penis even being inserted into them if your brain is HUGE. Enlarge the size of your brain. Go for Brain-Enlargement SPAM. The size of a man's penis and the depth of a woman's vagina? Sometimes equals, somtimes opposites. If the size of the brains are equal? You have your perfect fit regardless of the roll of the dice. Take a risk. Bet big. The way real men think and real women think? Big. Equals. The way unreal men and unreal women think? Small. Equals again.The unreal man thinks with his dick. The unreal woman thinks with her vagina. Real men and unreal men? Opposites. Real women and unreal women? Opposites. Real men and real women. Equals. Intellectual Giants. See? Size is important. Size of the brain.
[Colour?]
[Pulsating Purple?]
[Throbbing Red?]
[Sperm White?]
[Labial Fuchsia?]
[Bold?]
[Centre?]
Bet the length of your penis or the depth of your vagina on it. All on Black? All on No. 69? On the roulette wheel of life? But more importantly? Bet the sum total of your intellectual property on it. But don't always thing big. Bet big but sometimes think small. All this talk about size? Mind Monopoly. Play fair. Don't put too many hotels on Playfair. Try Park Lane sometimes. Life is a roll of the dice. Double sixes fit. Six and One don't. Two threes fit. But a four and three makes 7? If you can add up. Not everyone is a six and not everyone is a one. Albeit unique and one. Men's penises vary in size. Women's vaginas vary in depth. It's all about a perfect fit. A perfect roll of the dice. But you have to play a bit of Mind Monopoly to understand this principle. Or Squatter. For when women squat? Expect a golden shower and cleanse yourself. Take a ruler (Not a Howard or George Dubba-Ya type:a school ruler). Take instruction and be wise. Shove a ruler (or preferably a depth guage) into 1000 women. Do a decent survey. No Morgan Giddy-Up or Gallop Pole. And don't pervert or alter the stats to make them say what you want them to say. Be real. Or get a job as a Govt Statistician if you're like that. Once you've plunged the ruler in? Pull it out. Check the 'water' stains. See how far a woman's come comes up? Look for a G-shaped stain. Use a magnifying glass if you have to. It will be there somewhere. Observe closely how the increments differ. Then measure the length and breadth and depth of your penis. With the same ruler. Don't touch it against your foreskin though. Far too erotic. And once you've got the measurements right? See? Size? It's all rubbish. (unless we're discussing comparative sizes of vagina-depths and penis-lengths, not just the size of the penis. All this talk about size? It's all designed to make the modern man feel inadequate and accept those penis-enlargement SPAM offers. When the reality is? Real women don't just measure the size of your erect penis; they measure the size of your brain. Call in the neuro-surgeon. Right now! Do a scan. Boost your self confidence. Love-making is about full-on mind and body engagement. Real women? THey can come without your penis even being inserted into them if your brain is HUGE. Enlarge the size of your brain. Go for Brain-Enlargement SPAM. The size of a man's penis and the depth of a woman's vagina? Sometimes equals, somtimes opposites. If the size of the brains are equal? You have your perfect fit regardless of the roll of the dice. Take a risk. Bet big. The way real men think and real women think? Big. Equals. The way unreal men and unreal women think? Small. Equals again.The unreal man thinks with his dick. The unreal woman thinks with her vagina. Real men and unreal men? Opposites. Real women and unreal women? Opposites. Real men and real women. Equals. Intellectual Giants. See? Size is important. Size of the brain.
This post? ...
O, I took a Man (Men) Pause over this one ...
David ...
Mal
What are you doing up at this time of the morning? Don't answer that. Sometimes, I think I know you as well as I know myself. You sound sick.
U-Turn & Return.
Mal.
Calling me sick? ...
Coming from you? ...
I take that as a compliment of the highest order ...
You do seem to know me quite well ... It's quite disconcerting at times ... and yet exhilirating at the same time (in a totally non-gay way ... okay??? ... (I just love people with self-knowledge ... and perception ... (It's just a personal thing ...
I get the impression from your posts that you are not gay like e-NORM-ous ... (which makes me wonder how the two of you became such close friends ...
You must have a lot of compassion for your fellow human beings to befriend both me and a sicko, sexual deviant like e-NORM-ous ... *** (Na, that's a joke ... I love his posts ... [writing ones, okay? Not his thighs ... ***
I thoroughly enjoy your posts ...
It's like reading my own thoughts on the screen sometimes ... Keep up the good work ...
I'm sure e-NORM-ous appreciates it ...
David ...
Consumption Malfunction
Equal and Opposite
Arses and Elbows
Footy Power
pissing David's pants over this one.
I've told you all about him.
You've probably guessed the rest.
He's outraged, all the way in.
David,
stay away from Mal's arse, if that's at all possible.
Dusk might get jealous.
*****Rommel*****
Ah Norm. The True Ant.
Mal
Your tears in David's underpants will be offered up as an evening sacrifice. (Melchisedech - You are a priest forever).. And yes, thank you for telling me all about your virutal gay love-interest, David, in private, and how often you use his underpants to blow your bolt, but could you please relegate it to private messaging? I have a blogging reputation to uphold here. I came onto your site (literally, as in, in a literal sense, not literally, as in, spoofing over your blog. I might stop, and save the rest for a private message. Seriously, Norm? Either come out of the closet properly, or? Just continue the diatribe?).
U-Turn & Re-Turn.
Mal.
e-NORM-ous ? ...
To the best of my recollection ... Dusk has never taken an interest in Mal's arse ... Stephen Larkhams' yes ... but I think after the results of this weekend's Rugby? ... (Fuck ... gonna get caned for that comment ...
Do not ever get on the wrong side of Dusk's eyebrows okay ??? ... *** ...
Or her Wallabies' snot rag ... (because on the other side of it? Pure spittle ... *** (fuck ... gonna get caned for that one as well ...
David ...
Better quit while I'm... Um ... behind? ... (or should I stay while I'm behind ? ... (metaphorically??? ...
Nup outa here RIGHT NOW ! ...
Rugby World Cup 2007
And just to clarify...your arsenal of words...your weapons of mass provoccation...that's the only asset I'm interested in...and that's my rebuttal to the Norm.
David mah Treasure...mah sugar...waiting to be caned.... it's never going to happen...
Dusk
Mal
U-Turn & Re-Turn & Modify.
Mal.
Mal
If I could list my intellectual property on the stock exchange? I would. And clean up. Not clean up here. I do that every day. Clean up in a literal money-making sense, not a post-come sense. Dusk, you have just furnished me with a brilliant idea. I will list my intellectual property as weapons, and see if any terrorist organisation takes up the offer. They will probably buy all of my stocks in a Wall-Street, human-sharks in suits, feeding-frenzy as soon as they are listed, and IP (That is what I'm calling my company) will be one more off-shore company, floating in cyberspace. But John Howard will be happy. He loves seeing money go off-shore. It's paid sycophancy, to line his brown, skid-marked stained Wallabies tracky dacks on his morning puppet-drives disguised as power-walks. Even his ego is fed by money. He eats Australian people's lives up and eats money. He is not a Treasure. Neither is he a Treasurer. Any more. He is our Post Menopause, Pre Menopause, Partaking Menopause PM, hence the abbreviation. John Howard You Be? He is not a treasurer's bootlace, or to use modern phraseology, he is not a treasurer's velcro strapping. Surely my intellectual property is easier to find than Suddam's hidden weapons of mass destruction that were never found. Or is it? It seems that many people cannot discover it, apart from those with depth themselves, who do dig deep. Mentioning any word that contains 'butt' in it to Norm? Not a good idea. He'll dissect the word re-butt-al, ring Al and re-butt him. He is one sick pup, Our Norm.
U-Turn & Re-Turn.
Mal.