NormPepsi & KFC weigh into the creationist / Darwin debate.
Pepsi (the only Cola sold at KFC outlets) are sponsoring Andrew Symond's mum, a committed Darwinist, and full-time resident of Sydney's Taronga Park Zoo by footing the bill for a year's supply of unshelled peanuts and lady-finger bananas for her son. Most of them will be shaped like Kookaburra Cricket balls so Andrew can practice his off-spinners from the public area, beyond the security fences. "I don't like getting mum out but if she's going to pull monkey faces like Indian supporters while I bowl, I'll be ripping the bananas and peanuts into the rough," Symonds said unapologetically. "You can choose your friends but you can't choose your primates or your teammates. Or something like that." Mrs Symonds has refused to wear a helmet even when hanging from a tree . "The zoo keepers have given me a wide-screen digital television, an LG TV, and a copy of the Black&White Minstrels, which is my favourite show because it reminds me of my son, but they put the screen upside down, so what choice do I have?" Harbajhan Sing said this was just one more examples of Aussie cheating. "We've been bowling bananas on dustbowls for peanuts for years." Coca Cola will be working feverishly to find one of those old thick bottles from the 60s to have a new pair of glasses for Steve Buchnor ready by the start of the third test in Perth, should the series go ahead. McDonalds have offered to let Buchnor use their mayonnaise factory to swim in so he appears white and non-racist next time he umpires, as long as he dresses up as Hamburgler. Pepsi and Coke? Even monkeys only use them to sanitise thier bumholes.
Consumption Malfunction
Equal and Opposite
Arses and Elbows
Footy Power
Coffee Quip
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