NormPissed as a Parrot or Sober as a Judge?
Being off your face? People will wonder why they’re speaking to a mask. And where the rest of you is. It will scare them. Especially children. Being shitfaced? People will hand you toilet paper and get you to wipe your mouth. Or flush you far from their lives. Being off the planet? No-one will speak to you at all. Other than aliens, and NASA astronauts, and the man in the moon, and if you hear a Moo? That’s the jumping cow. Woof? Dogs in Space. And those bits of human beings you keep bumping into? Dead astronauts. Being legless? You can apply for a disability pension. Being cactus? People will find you prickly. Being trashed? People will treat you like garbage. Being pissed as a parrot? You’ll repeat the same thing over and over again. Being pissed as a mute? No-one will listen to a word you say. Being drunk as a monkey? Evolutionists will kidnap you and put you on show as the missing link. Being maggoted? You’ll get sprayed with insect-repellent. Being drunk as a skunk? People will screw their noses up at you, and tell you, you stink. Being off your scone? You’ll never get an invite to a Catholic Women’s League morning tea function again. Being as Sober as a Judge? (Paradoxical?) People will find you bland and boring, and avoid you if they see you coming. Sobriety and Drunkenness. Not much difference for some people. Equally offensive.
Pissed ...
myself laughing in a non PMSL way ..
David ...
Consumption Malfunction
Equal and Opposite
Arses and Elbows
Footy Power
shit hot!
I really warmed to this little number.
Pissing myself in my cup of coffee.
Norm.
Mal
Your comments are always appreciated. There are times when I think we are very similar.
U-Turn & Return.
Mal.
Mal
I've heard of Irish Coffee. Where they put cream in it. But, coffee with Urine in it? Scottish Coffee? Because they're too tight and stingy to buy cream?
U-Turn & Re-Turn.
Mal.