NormRicky Ponting’s Mother Admits Having Sordid Affair With Indian Telemarketer.
Ricky Ponting’s father has placed Ricky’s mother in rehab for an out-of-control addiction to phone abuse and extra-marital affairs. Ponting’s father admitted that his wife was a long-time lover of abuse, and actively encouraged it in the household as young Ricky was growing up, even though Ricky’s father describes himself as a placid blue-collar worker of unquestionable integrity. “My wife wanted Ricky brought up in an atmosphere of personal abuse, sledging, racism and sexism,” he said, “in order to toughen him up for the rigours of international cricket, where players sometimes bat for at least two minutes over a five day period under intense pressure, and then have to go through the same intense pressure months later, after having to laze around doing next-to-nothing for ages. This type of lifestyle puts an extraordinary strain on an elite cricketer’s mind. All the cricketer wants to do is play cricket, not spend time travelling all over the world holidaying and shopping. You can talk all you like about Aussie cricketers being on million dollar contracts, but very few people understand how many sacrifices are involved. But back to my wife’s problems. I think it all started when Ricky left home to marry what’s-her-name. My wife missed the abuse at the kitchen table. I can’t remember the last time we had the evening meal before 11pm since Ricky left. She’s spent most nights just arguing with Indian telemarketers. Only recently, I found out she’d hooked up with one of those curry-munchers based in Hobart and has been having an affair with him since the 2005 Ashes loss. Don’t get me wrong. I’m no racist. I’d be just as upset if the bloke who was shagging her was an abo on the dole, or a mop-haired coconut from the West Indies. I just hope she’s not pregnant. We’ve already got one black guy playing for Australia.”
