NormThe root of all romance
When composting a piece of written material to impress the ladies with, the ladies have little idea of just how much swoonage they will suffer. It is not uncommon for me to send queues of hopeless whores into howls of horrendous haggling. I don't sell my body for any price. The fact of the matter is that the facts of the matter are completely irrelevant. Luckily for me few ladies know this little bit of information. Ladies really are as simple as they look. It is unwise to get on my wrong side, I'll unleash an almighty spray from my puffer in your general direction, and have you gasping for air. Ridicule is the heir apparent to embarrassment but I'm far too proud to let anyone into my own fallibilty. Fall of your chair with delight when I tell you that I'm laughing out loud but, don't be fooled by my orderly conduct - I'll chew your ears off if given half a chance. Words go in ears as text and in eyes as speech. Upside down and back to front you'll find me always a pleasure. Just don't call the shots. There is no pink to pot here. To stretch a short story long, the standing and lying creatures known as ladies just simply love me, in all my complexity and long-windedness. In all my complexity and long-windedness you'll dread being stuck on an escalator behind me. You'll pray for a nasty fall. I probably won't even see you behind the throng of adoring cows who straddle my slippers in an attempt to get close to the man they call the "best root this side of that tree". It's true I'm a good root but, you'd better leave me or I'll snap. Demonic in the sack and a sweet-talker to boot, you'll long to have me talking sweetly with my boots under your head. Take it from me, my penis is for you. Romance and rooting: opposite.
